Well, i will be honest and say that i don't really know the regulations of the video, you posted the video but i couldn't get it very clear.
So, i will start asking if you have time to change it, or even record some more footage, if not, then ignore it all and goes with what you already has, which is good. Just too common and obvious i'd say.
I mean, you have used the same song he did on his, you really followed his idea, but without the same amount of footage. If i noticed correctly, the video is to show the fun and the thrills of riding a bike to you. It's your video. You can use the song you feel like for it. Plus, the video doesn't need to be 4 minutes long, as it doesn't have to be as long as the music.
What i am trying to tell you is, try to find out what you like so much in riding a bike, is the the bike community? Are the twisty roads where you lean the bike while cornering?
Other thing, but that is more technical about the video, which also would require more footage, you have always the same angle for the camera. I don't know what equipament you use to hold it, but would very interesting if you can get different angles on camera, even if you record some of them on your street. Careful with transitions and effects... even the video you used as an example carries too much on this... imagine that your video is a message, and the message, which is the fun of riding a bike, must be very clear.
And to finish, i'd remove the game part. Again, if you want something to be different, try to focus more on feelings, and sensations. And yes, i know it's not simple.
An example, for the ending, you can just use a footage of your bike, in the sunset, even better if you can only see the silhouette of the bike, and it doesn't have to be moving... and this small footage fades to black, slowly.