Things you know? about TDU2

[MadManCK]

Things you always didn't need to know about TDU, but have learned anyway

 

• Community Centre doesn't pay, even if you win a Challenge, because they can
  
• Pilot of the Seaplane is either drunk or getting there
  
• Sexy girl in grey coat is checking you out at the Airport
  
• Real Estate Agent looks for more...
  
• Tuning a Car can make it slower
  
• Best Deals are at the second hand shop. Tuning kits and 0 KM ! for a lower price
  
• There are more Pirates in TDU than in Somalia
  
• All folks have left the streets, to watch the race on TV
  
• All cars are driven by drunk drivers, looking for some Cherry at the Casino
  
• Everybody complains about cheaters, but the biggest cheat is the Casino
  
• The Cosmetic Girl knives you up, even if you just get a tan
  
• Call Girls Wash your Car, but can't be invited home
  
• The Wilder brothers are not related to Van Wilder
  
• If you jump over a car, you FRIM 350$
  
• Some n00bs can do 8.3 KM in 2.0 sec.
  
• Planes on Ibiza take off from the Taxilane
  
• All cars are controlled by the A.S.S. (Artificial Stupidity System)
  
• Casino is rigged by Atari Mob
  
• When you win, you lose, when you lose, you win.
  
• The guy from the second hand shop has a side deal as a Bartender
  
• You need a license to race but a n00b license to drive a Veyron
  
• If you drive trough a wall you end up in a Cave
  
• There is Eden Island, but no Eden "E'
  
• All in-game 'Faster' Suits are gay
  
• There are only Party People on both Islands
  
• Only Girls Cheat
  
• This game stimulates safe driving
  
• Tess likes to be on Top
  
• The FRIM Cave gives easy money
  
• There is a Patch for everything, even wounded games...
  
• Former Waitresses from Lisa's have found a new Job at the Carwash
  
• Where is Lisa?
  
• When you drive to the Casino, your Avatar always hits a tree.
  
• The brother of the Bartender runs a Classic Racing School
  
• When you drive a fast lap in the VIP you get 50.000$
  
• Propellors of the Seaplane run backwards
  
• Asian Chicks have expensive rides
  
• The CRC and Casino are run by the same Mobster
  
• A Blond Chick gives you 65.000$ to bring her Pagani Zonda Fangio to the dealer, 4.9 KM further
  
• Some Avatars move, like they just had a Visitation at the Airport
  
• In TDU2 an Aston V12 sounds like somebody who had Beans and Onions for Dinner
  
• Some People win, when playing both sides
  
• Some Clubs think ramming is a fair game.
  
• The same Clubs have only Cavemen as members
  
• A Bugatti Veyron is the weapon of choice for n00b losers
  
• Police is allowed to play in the Casino during work ours.
  
• The Island is full of Adrenaline Junkies, looking for a Quick Fix
  
• You can build a House on a Waterfall
  
• You can tune a 2CV to level 4, it does a shockwhopping 106 km/h
  
• The Merc SLS sounds cool, but the 722 Stirling sounds like Shampoo
  
• You can win a race by Dodging Veyrons
  
• If you hit a tree while doing a cheating girlfriend mission, you get proof Michael Jackson is still alive.
  
• A simple game can make you dislike a Car that you did admire before (Veyron).
  
• Some facial expressions of the Avatars makes you wonder if they had Chicken Vindaloo for Lunch.
  
• Most rammers are n00b losers.
  
• The Bartender can make 20 different Cocktails with just 2 bottles.
  
• Mercedes dealers on Ibiza place their Cars backwards, because they don't really want you to test their cars.
  
• If you know where to look, you can always find lost Party Girls in the Woods, tired of walking home.
  
• TDU Casino makes Madoff look like a Choir Boy.
  
• Red Headed guys on Hawaii get Cheated on all the time.
  
• Don't you want me? Bangbangbangbangbangbangbangbang.....
  
• There is a 100 year Old Tree near the Chinese Temple
  
• The Hairdresser smells bad, because he never changes clothes
  
• The same Hairdresser thinks you need a Haircut, even if you just went there
  
• The Real Estate Agent has a Black Belt in Karate
  
• All new Roads on Ohau lead no nowhere except to... more Roads
  
• Casino is flooded with 90 year Old Cougars in Miniskirts
  
• There is no safe Bet in Roulette
  
• You can Tune the Untunable at the Second Hand Shop
  
• You can Kiss my Pink Mustang
  
• The Sound of a Scuderia is a serious Buzzkill
  
• Adam lives on Eden Island
  
• Adam plays TDU on an Apple
  
• The Security guy at the entrance gives you the 'eye', when you get past him...
  
• I jumped over a House and drove off a Cliff, but his Grandma drives better. He is probably right
  
• Sit down, don't worry (You will only lose all your money on a winning bet)
  
• The Windmills on Ibiza turn backwards, generating negative energy that makes cars float in mid air
  
• A Chinese Monk managed to do a VIP lap in the Aileron in 15 sec. Must be a Kung Fu Master.
  
• Some Youngsters need to wash their mouth
  
• CRC is up and down, up and down like boobs in a Gym class
  
• Eden Servers are located in Egypt, but the backups are safe in Libya
  
• TDU2 is so well connected, that even the Atari Mob shivers from fear
  
• The secret about releasing a Patch is to make sure you get everyones attention
  
• A Patch and a Promise are no Substitute for the Good Old TDU vibes
  
• Pulling a Slot Machine Lever for Hours like a Zombie will get you a new Ride
  
• Will the Patch be released soon? Yes, of Courrse
  
• Will the Roulette be re-opened? Yes, of Courrse
  
• Will the CRC be open for Challenges? Yes, of Courrse
  
• Will the Casino Server be Stable? Yes, of Courrse
  
• Will the Devs fix this Game? One Moment Pleaze...
  
• Will TDU2 end up in the Bargain Bins, before the Patch? Yes, of Courrse....
  
• Mwooahaaa, you're really Mad
  

 

 

Ps. These have been posted before on another TDU forum, have fun.

[Ryzza5]

meh - this isn't that kind of forum (the TDU2.com type).

 

Some things were clever, but spoiled by others.

[Leadfoot[YT]]

meh - this isn't that kind of forum (the TDU2.com type).

 

Some things were clever, but spoiled by others.

 

+1. There were some zingers (quite a few, actually :) ), but some were also cringe-worthy.

 

-Leadfoot

[Rai06]

If you jump over a car, you FRIM 350$

 

 

Now that's nice. Liked some of the misc. facts. Can't believe some guy took the trouble to notice this while playing.

[Sponge]

You can also get mega FRIM by driving near someone with an extremely bad connection. Easy 10k :p

[eXile]

Only Girls Cheat

 

Haha where did you get that from ? :lol:

[Rai06]

You can also get mega FRIM by driving near someone with an extremely bad connection. Easy 10k :p

 

I'm the guy with the extremely bad connexion. Rarely go on now, Only get logged off in 2 secs.